Brittany Spears gives birth to half human/ half Grammy. Film at eleven.
She gives me a little booklet of her poetry
Its light blue
Six inches by six inches
Paper bound together by burlap string
The watercolor on the front is of some Chinese character
She tells me it means family
I read it
Front to back
Junior High School girls
Write better than this
This lady is still whining about some crush
Example:
My soul is floating like a tower
On the sea of oblivion
Now what the fuck does that mean?
Personal theories:
Please shoot me in the head because Im an oxygen wasting insect?
I want to fuck a lot but I dont want to say I want to fuck a lot?
Or maybe it really means what it says
And Im not poetic enough to grasp it
She says Id like it better
If I was open enough to understand
Doubt it
***
Imperfect
Im perfect
I dont want to die with a calm brow
And a steady hand
I dont want to die relaxed and
Feel acceptance
I want to die
The same way I came into this world
Kicking and screaming
***
Hip, Hip, Fillet!
She is 28. Shes was seeing her boyfriend for a while. She was worried because that night she had to meet
her boyfriends family. They came from all over the west to be together tonight. Her nails are purple. She
doesnt own anything purple. This freaked her out.
I suggested that she wear something black since it goes with any color. Her eyes got real big as a child
would if you were to give it a hundred dollar bill. Then got real small in disappointment as if I had
taken the hundred away.
Crap! I dont own anything black that doesnt say, knock me down and fuck me!
At that moment
I almost did
***
Nothing kills strength like weakness
She wants to stay in touch
We should be pen pals, she said
We trade phone numbers and addresses
I want to fuck her so bad I can taste it
***
While driving south on 395 I pass a Datsun mini truck with a sticker of the American flag. Underneath the
flag is the acronym, THESE COLORS DONT RUN and I instantly think of the American flag slumping in a
wheelchair unable to even walk let alone run or sprint. What a sad weakness to advertise. Your pride is your
end. Pride has killed more than any war and even in 2002, we are still not evolved enough to know how easy
it is to die. After September 11 we held onto our pride tighter becoming less and less tolerant as the Taliban
wait for the big dumb animal to do something big and dumb again
Hey! That guys got a gun! Run!
No way man these colors dont run. Dont worry; Im red, white and bulletproof. These colors dont know the
meaning of defeat.
Why, I bet that gun isnt even loa- BANG!
This country exists because some farmers with some good ideas knew when to run. That ability is what made us
in the first place and I think Americans are getting a bit too big for their britches. Running is in our roots
more than republicans, democrats, or Apple pie. You want to see your gun pulled from your dead dying hand?
Its so easy itll make your head spin.
***
Did you ever get the feeling that were wasting our time on the Rainforest?
That the Rainforest and all of the hubbub around it is really just a righteous example of global nostalgia?
That maybe were living in the post-apocalyptic era right now
That maybe the communication age has been over for years
That the deceit and denial age is happening right now full throttle
And Green Peace organizations are examples of mass denial gone a wry
Like believing in god
You can believe in the Peace Corp! EXCELLENT!
Maybe Green Peace is a euphemism for unable to adapt
You could turn it into a verb
As thousands jump on the bandwagon Greenpeacing their way to financial access!
Im talking the apocalypse NOW
Yes, today
The communication age?
You can communicate to someone over email using acronyms as thought processes
You can write your drug dealer
I saw the movie and it was so funny I was LOL!
and you can end that with a colon followed by a closing parenthesis that looks like a sideways face smiling!
Communication
Were all communicating
All of each and every one of us
The human hive known a planet Earth is plugged in and online!
Were all communicating!
Lets go communicate about communicating!
And isnt it great that were all communicating?
Hey man hold up I want to talk to you
Sorry pal! I gotta go communicate!
I dont think were communicating at all
Were just trading facts and figures
Barnes and Noble just sold ten thousand copies of Danielle Steeles new book
While Knut Hamsun collects dust
But somehow everyones exited about how Americas gone towards reading!
Am I an angry man?
I am a thinking man
Why do mass murders kill human beings as if they were insects?
Probably because the human beings gave them no other choice
That they couldnt tell the difference
That the human beings didnt act like anything discernable to a cockroach
And how do you feel about killing a cockroach?
Are you a mad man?
The ant brings its piece of food inside the anthill and puts it in the correct compartment in which it would be best used and gets to work
You bring your briefcase to the elevator and press floor 38 where you will then go to your cubicle, open your briefcase and get to work.
The queen mother ant sends orders from her antennae to the antennae of the worker ants to keep the hive going smoothly
You just got a mass memo from your boss over email about a new program the company is taking on. You and your co-workers make the necessary adjustments.
Is size all that really matters here?
It sure isnt abstract thought because you let that go when you left kindergarten
Face the facts:
You are in prison
Whether surrounded by bars or white-picket fence
I visit your white-picket prison to remind myself why hate is so important
Youre a white-picket person
With a white-picket wife
Popping out your 2.5 white-picket children
In your white-picket world
On fire
***